1Kings 2:1-3
So You Want To Be A Man?
As the book of 1Kings begins, it is time for David to die. Solomon, one of his
sons, is to take his place on the throne. In this passage, David challenges
Solomon to "shew thyself a man." In our way of speaking, we would say, "SOLOMON,
BE A MAN."
That is an interesting challenge. Obviously, Solomon was a male. He was also
a male with a lot of years under his belt. Other verses tell us that Solomon
became king when he was forty years of age. Yet David issues the challenge,
BE A MAN. The implication is that you can be a male, even an older male, and
not be much of a man.
Our country has a lot of males in it. According to the 2000 census, 49.1% of
the overall population is male, but I do not believe it has very many MEN in it.
1. Most males seem to think that being a man is knocking up a girl, drinking
beer, and being profane.
2. The statistics of our country bear this out:
a. 40% of all children are reared in a single-parent home.
b. Among certain minorities, the figure is 70%.
c. Rape and sexual assault are high (typically a male crimes).
d. The welfare roles have been fat for years (meaning a lot of men are
simply not working).
e. Violence, crime, gang activities, again these are predominately male
behaviors, continue to rise.
What makes a man?
1. It is not his whiskers - cats have those.
2. It is not his muscles - apes have those.
3. It is not having someone follow him - ducks have those.
4. It is not his ability to reproduce - girls can do that.
So what is manhood? May I give you some Biblical observations?
I. Men are those who act right.
A. In order to understand everything else I will say about men and
right behavior, I have to make a statement first.
1. Men are not animals.
a. For decades now, our children have been taught that they are
animals.
b. We are not.
(1) We are uniquely, created beings.
(2) \\#Ge 1:26\\ We are created in the image of God.
2. That being said, I can say that any man who is pattering his
lifestyle after that of an animal is not living up to his
potential as a man.
B. Every human is a moldable, impressionable being.
1. God made us that way.
a. It is Fathers’ Day so we do need to point some things out.
b. It is the duty of the parents to impress their children in a
good and godly way.
2. However, because each man is impressionable, he can go in either
one of two directions.
a. If you tell a man he is an animal, he can live DOWN to that
level.
b. If you teach a man he is created in the image of God, he at
least can know that he has a potential to live UP to the
image of what he was created to be.
C. For way too long, our people have been living down to the animal
level and not up to our potential as a man.
1. It is animals not humans who mate with the first available being.
2. It is animals not humans that simply take whatever they need
or desire.
3. It is animals not humans that turn on another.
4. It is animals not humans that run in gangs.
5. It is animals not humans that sleep all day and prowl all night.
6. It is animals not humans that live from pleasure to pleasure.
7. It is animals not humans that satisfy their urges without regard
for where they are or what it looks like.
8. It is animals not humans that do what they do without any thought
of the consequences.
9. It is animals not humans who act on instinct and desire, not
reason or self control.
D. We may be breeding a lot of males but we aren’t producing very many
men.
1. Many of the animal behaviors have bleed into our homes.
a. Some men come home from work,
beat on their chest like a ape,
bark orders like a dog,
crow like a rooster,
and then lay on the couch like a sitting hen.
b. Gentlemen, there is to be more to our behavior than that.
c. We must learn to live UPWARD into the image of our God -
tenderness, gentleness, love, compassion, kindness,
gratitude, and helpfulness.
2. Now, Dads, you ought not get upset when you sons start to act
like you!
a. You argue with their mother and wonder why they do it.
b. Some dads, drink like fish, smoke like a chimney, cuss like
a sailor and then wonder where their children learned it.
3. Children do what they see!
E. When a male is taught that he is created in the image of God, that
at least gives him the potential to rise toward the image of his
Creator.
1. When humans pattern their lifestyle after higher qualities, we
call it "developing character."
2. The pagan world would not agree with me but let me say it any
way.
a. Character comes from practicing the teachings of Christ.
b. Every good character trait is a Christ-like trait.
c. honesty, kindness, diligence, self-sacrifice, temperance,
self-control, courage, honor, goodness
F. Some might question, if it is possible for men to be better, why
aren’t they?
1. Because we are not being taught the truth, not by our schools,
not by our science, and not by our own parents!
2. Because it is always easier to go downhill than uphill.
a. It is easier to act like an animal than to follow Jesus’
example.
b. Because of our sin nature, it is more natural for us to do
wrong than to do right.
(1) The Bible teaches us that we have a bend in us to do
wrong.
Hosea 11:7 And my people are BENT to backsliding from me: though they called
them to the most High, none at all would exalt him.
(2) "As the twig is bent, so grows the tree."
(3) All human beings have a bend in our nature that takes
us away from God.
(4) That is 100% of us.
Psalm 14:2 The LORD looked down from heaven upon the children of men, to see if
there were any that did understand, and seek God.
3 They are all gone aside, they are all together become filthy: there is none
that doeth good, no, not one.
3. Because we lack role models.
a. I heard Tony Evans give an illustration in a sermon on
which aired June 20, 2009.
b. A herd of African elephants was going wild. The herd was
experiencing excessive internal fighting and maiming. They
were attacking humans and villages and had other problems.
A group of experts was called in who noticed that all the
grown bull elephants were gone. They researched and found
they had been killed for their ivory. Now, the younger
(teenage) male elephants were trying to lead, but they just
were not ready for that role. The researchers air-lifted
some bull elephants from another herd into the problem
group. It wasn’t long before the new arrivals were
exhibiting some unusual behavior. They would raise their
trunks in the air, flop their ears, and let out a loud cry.
They would then repeat that actions several times. The
researches deduced that this was the bull elephants way of
telling the younger males that if they did not back down,
they would have to face them. Within a few weeks, the herd
was back to its normal behavior.
c. People aren’t animals but people need to see other people
doing right!
d. In that same sermon, he shared how a principal called asking
for help. Gangs and drugs had gone wild in his school. Dr.
Evans asked to speak to all the boys in the auditorium. He
took 25 of his deacons with him. They stood in the aisles
while Dr. Evans spoke on what it took to be a man. He said
you could immediately tell these boys were seeing something
they had never seen before. 25 black men, well-educated and
successful, dressed in suits and ties, in one place. He said
whenever one the boys started acting up, one his deacons
went to him and told him to listen when he was being spoken
to. He said they did this only one time, but the gang
activity in that school was almost eliminated.
G. How can I control my behavior?
1. Some men are able by sheer will power to make themselves a better
man.
a. Most do not.
b. But even if you do, better is not good enough.
2. To be the best man you can be, you need:
a. Jesus as your Savior.
b. You need to build your life on Jesus Christ.
c. You need to yield your life to the Holy Spirit.
II. Men are those who think right.
A. What I am going to say may surprise some folk.
1. The Bible is not just interested in telling us how to behave.
2. It wants to control how we think too.
Romans 12:1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye
present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is
your reasonable service.
2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of
your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect,
will of God.
Ephesians 4:17 This I say therefore, and testify in the Lord, that ye
henceforth walk not as other Gentiles walk, in the vanity of their mind,
18 Having the understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God
through the ignorance that is in them, because of the blindness of their heart:
19 Who being past feeling have given themselves over unto lasciviousness, to
work all uncleanness with greediness.
20 But ye have not so learned Christ;
3. Since the way we behave is mostly determined by the way we
think, it makes sense that God wants us to change the way we
think.
B. Seeing things the way God sees them is what the Bible calls wisdom.
1. Wisdom only comes from God and God’s Word.
Proverbs 2:6 For the LORD giveth wisdom: out of his mouth cometh knowledge and
understanding.
2. In our day, man’s reasoning, not God’s Word, has been elevated
to the pinnacle of highest reverence.
3. The problem is that man’s reasoning has been and is flawed.
a. Man’s science has falsely reasoned that humans evolved from
lower life forms.
b. Man’s psychology has falsely reasoned that God is nothing
more than a weak man’s crutch.
c. Man’s sociology has falsely reasoned that there is no higher
law than the majority rules.
d. Man’s ideology has falsely reasoned that anything goes as
long as we get the desired results.
4. All of this false reasoning has definitely had an impact on the
behavior of our men. It is a large part of why we act so
animalistic.
C. Can I remind you of some things God’s Word teaches?
1. Life is sacred.
Exodus 20:13 Thou shalt not kill.
2. Marriage is sacred.
Exodus 20:14 Thou shalt not commit adultery.
3. Worship is sacred.
Exodus 20:3 Thou shalt have no other gods before me.
4 Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image….
7 Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain….
8 Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy.
4. Your word is sacred.
Exodus 20:16 Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour.
5. Family is sacred.
Exodus 10:12 Honour thy father and thy mother.
6. Personal property is important.
Exodus 20:15 Thou shalt not steal.
7. Being content with what you have is important.
Exodus 20:17 Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s house, thou shalt not covet
thy neighbour’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor
his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour’s.
D. If these things seem familiar to you, it is because they are the
Ten Commandments.
1. These commandments, and others, put down the code for THINKING
that made this country great.
2. In the last few generations, that code has been changed.
a. Instead of Biblically-based thinking we have humanistically-
based thinking.
b. This new thinking is animalistic and selfish in nature.
c. Men, if we do not return to a Bible-based way of thinking,
the independent, just, free, powerful, and wealthy
country that we have enjoyed will be no more.
E. Men must think beyond their own needs and wants to the needs of
others.
1. We must think wisely.
2. To do so, we must have Christ in our heart and the Word of God
in our minds.
III. Men are those who desire right.
A. Not all behavior is controlled by what we think.
1. If it was, all you would have to do to change someone’s behavior
is to convince them, intellectually, that they need to do so.
2. Many of us have had friends or family who knew it was bad for
them to drink, smoke, steal, commit adultery, over-eat…, but
they kept doing it.
B. This is the reason that psychology or secular counseling alone does
not fix our problems.
1. Most counseling is people connecting from mind to mind.
2. Counseling is often missing the spirit or the HEART.
3. Maybe you have tried to help someone stop something harmful to
them and you talked until you couldn’t talk anymore. You finally
came to the conclusion that "their heart just wasn’t in it."
4. The Bible uses the word HEART like that.
Matthew 12:34 O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good
things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.
C. Most say the word HEART means emotions.
1. To "Put your heart into something" would mean to want it badly
enough to do what it takes to get it.
2. I would say that the heart is more than just emotions.
a. I would say that to put your heart into something is to put
your spirit into it.
b. A man’s spirit is more than just his emotions. It is the part
of his being that gives him life.
c. But for the sake of time, let’s just speak of the heart as if
it were just desire and emotions.
d. Let’s just say that men must have the right desire.
D. While many men will do mostly right most of their lives, they still
have wrong desires.
James 1:14 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and
enticed.
1. It is the wrong desires that makes us so vulnerable when a
wicked opportunity comes along.
2. While most will control their desires, what we really need is a
desire transplant.
3. We need the Holy Spirit of God to actually change our very nature.
a. We receive our new nature at salvation.
b. We learn of our new nature through the Word of God.
c. But our nature isn’t changed until the Holy Ghost takes full
control of our lives.
E. To be honest, this is where Solomon failed.
1. God gave Solomon access to Himself in ways that you and I do not
have.
2. God gave Solomon wisdom beyond what you and I will probably ever
attain.
3. However, Solomon failed (in my estimation it was a colossal
failure) because Solomon was still controlled by his old
desires.
F. This tells me that the only way to truly live up to our potential
as men is to:
1. Be saved.
2. Have the Word of God fill our minds.
3. Be completely yielded to the Holy Ghost.
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